emotional roller coaster

this week has been one of many ups and downs, not much sleeping, some crying nights and now a head cold. so please keep me in your prayers!! love you all, sorry for not updating much. did have a good thanksgiving with aunt and uncle, cousins and friends. God is still keeping me strong in my weakness though. I praise and thank Him for my faith!

well.....to keep things short i spent last week cleaning a bunch of "junk" out of my room and organizing a lot i tend to be a packk rat. and still adjusting to life at home for the time being. last weekend i was able to go camping with a big church group that i love and cherish and just enjoy time relaxing and enjoying nature away from the hub bub of cell phoones, tv, and craziness. This week i really was able to dig into Isaiah and really glean from God and his anger and love to the nations and to his people. Now i am spending some time with my two brothers (sister in law and niece). Its really hard because i want to stay closely connected with my family and that is hard when they are far away. Last night i was able to see brother kirk (sophomore at bethel) play soccer and take a bunch of balls to the head, cold but a fun time. Have not been able to connect with him much, except through sports or brief conversations that we may have. I have not quite accepted that boys will be boys and are not quite as vocal or talkative as we females. So i pray this time especially with my brothers will just be a time to talk and know their hearts, as i dont get to do that much. I was able to eat breakfast and spend a short time with a Bethel friend and just share life and kind of talk about some funny stuff but also some core stuff. A sweet song that i was listening to in the car was "Fall on Jesus" a good reminder of our daily need for our Savior. This week i have really been reading and rereading the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-20) and what it means to put that on daily! This morning i was reading Psalms 34 and the first verse has been the meditation of my heart today as i go about my day and have conversation with people., "His praise shall continually be in my mouth". Sorry this is only a weekly thing i dont mean for that to happen, but i have been able to talk to some of you on the phone which has been a blessing. Please pray that i would find contentment for this season in my life and believe GOd has me where he wants me! much love...Brittany Noelle

changes

sorry to those of you who want to keep tabs on me and i have not been doing a good job at all at keeping you updated. i would say i did not tell the truth in my last entry and telling you whats really going on deep inside. well things have been a little bit crazy. after about a week of sleepless nights and i believe intense spiritual warfare (my roomate said i was asleep one night with an angry look on my face), some depression it just intensified to where i could not sleep, concentrate, i was very emotional and anxious, my eating pattern was off. i really didnt have weapons ready and my prayers to God were few. I wanted to be in control and believe i was until it was too much. the bottom line is the program that i was in it was not safe to be there for me and it was best i come home and take some time to kind of regroup for a bit. i just got really sick and my body physically could not handle even the littlest things. A lot of different things are running through my head right now. God knew this was going to happen and has had his hand in it all. One of my dear friends from the institute was willing to drive me to chicago, where my dad took a train met me and drove me home. To those of you who supported me financially for the institute,i do not have an answer yet but will talk to the financial guy in the morning as to what will happen to your money. I miss my class dearly and long to be back with them. I may go back in january but don't know if that is possible depending where the Lord has me. I would appreciate prayers and am willing to talk to you if you want. So.....i am home in kalamazoo, MI for right now and i pray that i will be content for this season and journey in my life. sorry to if this comes as a shock to most of you, love you all!

New beginnings....

Well i feel like i could write so much but i will just give you a brief overview of the last two weeks. From the moment we moved in it was so crazy and scheduled stuff for us every minute practically. Saturday night we had a great message by Joe white the president of the kamps i work for in the summer. It was about discipleship and what that looks like. Then we hung out had some fellowship and games with fellow students. There are 25 guys and 25 girls in the program. My roomates name is Debbie from Liberty, Missouri. We get along great. Last weekend we took a two day camping trip. Some of the highlights were cliff jumping and having about an hour and a half of solitude time called cleansing and filling where i looked at scripture pondered some questions and just prayed. A typical class day is from 8-12 then a lunch break and back in the afternoon from about 2-5 not every day do we have afternoon classes. Last week Karen chancey gave us an overview of old testament history and we did this hand motion thing to help us remember it. We also had David Lawson come in and teach us about inductive bible study which really helps you slow down and read passages over and over. We also took a spiritual gifts test which my number one is serving and ministry and my second is mercy. WE also took a personality test and i am a strong "otter" if you know what that is. On fridays in the morning we do precepts and are going through isaiah. We got a really important assignment which is to write a vision statement for where we want to go after the institute. This past saturday i found out more about my internship (which i put in 8 hours a week) and i will be working with junior highers and doing Klife. I also met my host family this past thursday great people and look forward to spending more time with them. for now thats all, will update you soon.